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Devil's Dictionary

Ambrose Bierce's Devil's Dictionary is one of those delightfully curmudgeonly books that I've had on my shelves for ages, and that follows me no matter how low I am on trunk space. A great many authors have tried since to capture the level of acerbity and wit of the original ("Forefinger, n The finger commonly used in pointing out two malefactors"), but few ever manage it.

John Derbyshire has attempted, in the Sept. 29th National Review, to compile a new list of terms. They're right-wing biased, some of them are mean-spirited instead of curmudgeonly (a fine line), and some of them just aren't that good. But two, in particular, caught my eye as having a certain Bierceness:

judiciary, n., A body of citizens charged with making those laws that Congress has omitted to make.

marriage, n. An archaic institution for the oppression of women and the abuse of children, from participation in which homosexual couples are cruelly and unjustly barred.

Though I'm not sure it improves upon the originals:

marriage, n. The state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two.

Good ol' Ambrose, he's tough to beat.

Comments

What a great book. I had a good chuckle reading your entry. Sounds like Columbia is suiting you just fine :) Best of luck -Heather

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