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Batman is a Republican and Spiderman is a Democrat

It's only a week until the polls open. The candidates have spoken, the pundits have punded... has a single voice not yet been heard? Certainly for New Yorkers, there's one more opinion we need to hear from. Really, before Gotham goes to vote, shouldn't we consider which lever our heroes will pull when they get out of their spandex and into the voting booth? Which is why I'm here to explain to you that Batman is a Republican, and Spiderman is a Democrat.

Consider the evidence.

  • Class: Batman's hides in plain site as billionaire playboy Bruce Wayne. Peter Parker spends a lot of his non-webswinging time getting Aunt May's jewelry out of hock. Who do you think benefited more from Bush's tax cuts?
  • Military Spending: Sure, Spiderman has a host of little electronic spider-trackers, his web-spinners (unless you go by the movie version) and various other bits of tech. But this pales in significance before the Batmobile, the Batcomputer, the Batplane... Certainly when it comes to allocating $87 billion for an invasion, Batman's going to show a lot less hesitation than, say, John Kerry.
  • Views on the Power Structure: Batman does things that are thoroughly illegal, whilst working with low-level officers (Commissioner Gordon) and building coalitions (including, occasionally, unsavory elements like gang bosses). He's routinely denounced by mayors, governors, presidents, and anyone else who has no idea of facts on the ground. Remind you of any coalitions of the willing? Spiderman, on the other hand, is only really hated by the Daily Bugle. And lets face it, does the Bugle more closely resemble the New York Times or the New York Post? As they say, I report, you decide.
  • Motivation: Spiderman is all about "great power" and "great responsibility." Indeed, he can drone on about it repetitively in a style as flat as a certain Boston Brahmin. He's driven by guilt that he did one thing wrong long ago, and thus must make amends for the rest of his life by making sure nothing like that ever happens again. Batman, on the other hand, gets up in the morning driven by a sense of abstract eye-for-an-eye justice probably deriving from a deep-set desire for vengeance. (And let's consider how little hold Michael Moore must have on Batman. You can just imagine the most famous orphan in comics: "You mean George W. Bush has an obsessive desire to defeat Hussein? Sounds reasonable to me: Hussein tried to kill his father.")
  • Willingness To Break The Law To Get The Bad Guys: Once again, Spiderman endures endless angst about whether his spandex-clad role is compatible with New York's existing legal order. Batman, on the other hand, considers Gothams existing order either fundamentally corrupt or ineffective, and so doesn't mind stepping around it. Remind you of anyone's attitudes towards the UN?
  • UPDATE--Fascist Reputation: Frequent commentor Sarah reminds me of one more: lefties like to call Batman things like "a rather fascistic Reagan-era hero." See, e.g., Mark Gauvreau Judge, Holy Censorship, Batman! Guess Who's Banning Comic Books, Washington Post, June 09, 1996, C5 (interview with Art Spiegelman). And what's more Republican than having a lefty call you a fascist?

So there you go. If you fancy the Caped Crusader, vote Gotham in 2004. If teenage webswingers are more your thing, vote NYC. If you're having a hard time finding a way to take voting in New York very seriously, here's your motivation.

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I don't think you're properly factoring in that billionaires (and in fact, most of those with more than 10 million) favor Kerry by a large margin. Search slate for "Billionaires for Kerry" or go to http:// + slate. + msn. + com/id/2108136/ (would have it assembled, but your spam filter kills me)
Would Superman be a Libertarian then? He believes in freedom for all and less government intervention in lives. Let the people take care of themselves, they are the heroes. Sounds like supes BTW, a reason Batman cannot be a Replubican, he has never been married and has no child to make his life misearable. What self respecting republican remains unmarried for so long? Spidey might not be a democrat because he stays true to his responsibilities even it costs him his last penny. Does not sound like a democrat to me...
Diggin' your analogy! I've always favored Batman over Spiderman anyway - Spidey can be such a whiner, and Batman does what he needs to do without any super powers. By the way, I'm willing to give Batman a pass on the not marrying thing. I don't think it's that he never wanted to, I think it's more that when you carry around something that heavy, it's hard to find someone you can trust with it. Besides, that kind of attachment leaves you open to a lot of crap. Look what happened to Spidey. And hey, there have to be some differences between the candidates and their "alter egos"! They are only comic book characters, after all.
I think you left out a couple of concerns for Batman. First of all, he's probably bisexual...his relationship with Superman is just a little too heated for there not to be sublimated sexual energy in there (and *animated* Batman has a weird fixation on the Flash, see the "A Better World" episode of *Justice League*). So that would discourage him from voting Republican. On the other hand, even though Wayne Enterprises doesn't build weapons, per se, that kind of company is inevitably a part of the military-industrial complex, and Batman's smart enough to know that. Maybe those two cancel out, leaving us with the usual rule of thumb that fascist vigilantes do tend to go Republican.
Your reasoning is well presented, especially given the inherent absurdity. And I agree with you that Pater Parker must be a Democrat. However, Bruce Wayne cannot be a Republican. For you see, the Batman never kills. Batman does not allow his apprentices to kill, nor his colleagues in the JLA, and he opposes the death penalty. He places his enemies not in a prison, but in an asylum; no Republican would claim that these murderers are sick, he would simply denounce them as evil. And what kind of Republican would pass up chance after chance to strangle the life out of a monster like The Joker?
TLAM: While I can see your point with regards to the death penalty, it's worth noting that (a) he doesn't place his enemies in an asylum--that's where Gotham puts them; and (b) not all Republicans are pro-capital punishment. While I can see this would be a deviation from "orthodoxy" in Republican circles, I think the rest of the above suffices to show Batman's predominately Republican leanings.
So what you're saying is, spiderman is a liberal wiener, batman is a rightwing nut-job?
What's Wolverine of the "The X-Men"?!?
Wolverine is one of those swing voters who actaully never votes because he is everywhere all at the same time. The guy must have racked up mad flier miles by now.
I agree that Batman is a clear right-winger; but I don't know if I would call him a "Republican" -- he's more like a right-wing anarchist (or perhaps a "paleolibertarian" or just a "libertarian"). He clearly believes in law & order, but doesn't believe in the state -- or at least he views most governments as corrupt and doesn't believe that corrupt government should have a monopoly on policing. BTW: I'm semi-serious. If you've read *the* quintessential Batman -- Frank Miller's "The Dark Knight Returns" and its sequel, this is exactly how Miller writes him. Miller is a "mainstream Republican" hating left-wing anarchist, and it shows in those books. But he seems to write Batman as if he were a right-wing anarchist. Miller also does seem sympathetic toward libertarianism. His respect for Ayn Rand shows in those books.
As much as one my think Batman is a republican from an economic standpoint, he just does not strike me as a republican. Batman clearly is for gun-control. He also was against Lex Luthor running for president, who i think is clearly republican.
Batman is an anarchist, he has no regard for any legal structure that he percieves to interfere with his ability to apprehend and punish thugs, he's clearly pro-capitalist and has absolutely no qualms with using extreme violence in defense of himself and others. He has no respect or awe in regards to government officials, and the moment he sees thuggery he knocks their asses flat just like he does to all the other punks. Batman is not a Republican because he is not a statist, Batman is a Libertarian. And Batman is not for gun control. Batman doesn't use guns because he doesn't need them. He has never showed any problems with the use of firearms by people who are incapable of defending themselves because they lack his grand display of gadgets and martial skills. He's also been quick to beat the crap out of the President (Dark Knight Returns, Dark Knight Strikes Back) and bust a cop for being part of a government conspiricy to oppress its citizens dissent against the war in 'Qurac'.(JLA #83)
In the new movie, "Batman Begins," I detected a clear shift in Batman's political leanings. From the time Bruce Wayne's parents are murdered, Bruce dedicates himself to vengence by any means necessary. During this time, he is clearly a Republican. With the help of the beautiful assistant D.A. Rachel Dawes, he abandons the search for vengence and instead embraces the ideal of justice. From that point on, he is a Democrat. Also, the philanthropy and concern for poverty of the Wayne parents are clear Democratic hallmarks. The pre-Batman Bruce Wayne was a Republican, but upon donning the batsuit, Batman became a Democrat.

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